Olivio Rodrigo calls out the Double Bind for women in“all-american bitch”
Olivio Rodrigo has commented that her song “all-american bitch” expresses the “repressed anger and feeling of confusion [of being] put in a box as a girl,” something she had been trying to articulate since she was 15.
What the song captures, however, is much more than just “anger” and “confusion.” Through the juxtaposition of positive female attributes, Rodrigo inadvertently points out the double bind latent in unrealistic expectations of women.
A double bind refers to any expectation that is contradictory or impossible to meet. For example, women are often expected to be both “warm” and “competent,” qualities that are sometimes seen as opposites. As a result of the perception that women are “soft” or emotional, both men and women tend to not take women seriously in the workplace, particularly in politics and business. Studies show that women who take charge and demonstrate toughness are viewed as unlikeable. The double bind refers to the catch-22 women find themselves in when they are dinged for being too emotional but also dinged for being too tough and unemotional.
In her song “all-american bitch,” Rodrigo makes the case mainly that she is really well-behaved! When someone sleights her, she has no problem forgiving and forgetting. Like a good little girl, she acts appropriately at all times even it means someone might take advantage of her good will. As a woman and a young woman, she “know[s] her place.” She does not speak out or complain. Instead, she is “kind,” “grateful,” and an “eternal optimist.” She is so positive, in fact, there is a beam of sunlight coming out of her pocket, an absurd image that highlights the ridiculousness of being endlessly positive.
Like an ideal woman, she cares about your feelings. “I feel for your every little issue,” she says. “I know just what you mean.” She is so caring, she’s got “love to spare.”
Unlike the stereotypical woman who gets too emotional, however, this girls contains her emotions well. “I don’t get angry,” she says, even when she
gets “pissed off.” Rather, she behaves with decorum and dignity. Sweet and old-fashioned, she uses vintage Coca-Coca glass bottles to “curl [her] hair,” a ridiculous and oddly specific image highlighting the lengths she will go to maintain her sweet Shirley Temple curls and dedication to all things American. She behaves so perfectly, she is “classy” and compares herself to a debutante or a “Kennedy.” She is the “perfect All American,” she says. Full stop.
Oh, but let’s not forget! She‘s hot — also very important to being a perfect woman! She is “sexy” with “perfect All-American “lips” and “hips.” (A previous version of the song alluded to “perfect…tits,” but Rodrigo changed it to be less raunchy.) There is no doubt, the girl is “pretty” and has a great body. She is is tone and “built like a mother and a total machine.” A couple things going on here: 1. She has the curves of a “mother,” that is, a woman with gentle, child-bearing hips but at the same time, the girls works out. She is a “machine.” She is simultaneously hard and soft. 2. When Rodrigo says she’s built like a “mother,” we know that “fucker” is very likely right around the corner. While she sings sweetly that she has a mom body (which the 90-pound waif most certainly does not have), she is built like a mother fucker and a “total machine.” She has a great body, but the line also says, don’t mess with her.
Which brings us to the girl’s strength, which comes out in the second line of the song. In addition to being empathetic and appropriate with a great bod, she is also strong, that characteristic in women that a lot of people, especially in business, can’t handle. She opens by saying she is both “light as a feather” and “stiff as a board,” meaning she cannot be easily broken.
Rodrigo declares all the various ways she adheres to ideals of femininity with an edginess that simmers with rage and ultimately communicates the opposite. While she is twisting herself in knots trying to conform to these female ideals, the behavior expected of her is total BS, she says. Through clenched teeth, she repeats that she is “grateful,” “grateful all the fucking time.” While she may say she is grateful, the truth is she’s entitled and aware of her talents, a characteristic accepted in men but despised in women. When she says she “know[s] [her] place,” and screams, “AND THIS IS IT,” she means that as a successful, Grammy-award winning artist at the age of 19 and the center of a lot of attention, she knows her worth. She knows she deserves the accolades and the limelight and has no intention of shying away from it like a good girl might.
The girl’s also oddly cruel, a recurring theme in Rodrigo’s songs. “I’m alright with the movies that make jokes ‘bout senseless cruelty. That’s for sure,” she says. Singing the lines sweetly in a high-pitched voice, the girl confirms that she likes cruelty. If she worked in an office, she might be the one to fire you and she would not flinch. What’s she’s saying is: don’t fuck with her.
The idea of cruelty comes out again when she says she “make[s] light of the darkness.” While the lyrics are a reference her endless positivity, one of the main attributes of a good girl, she is also saying that she makes “light of” or makes fun of things that are dark and cruel. The girl is strong but also low-key sick. She is not the good little girl everyone wants her to be. Whens she rocks out to the lyrics that she “forgive[s] and forget[s],” we can rest assured she does not.
The song is ultimately satisfying, because it spotlights the rigid societal expectations many — including women — have for women, to be sweet, kind, loving, empathetic, and hot, while not allowing them to be also capable, strong, aware of their talents, and so lacking in emotion as to be cruel, something which Rodrigo does most deliciously.
Awesome rendition by AJR who sings it from a male-perspective. (Someone, please explain this one to me.)
